Marriage Tip #1 “Be a Team”

In honor of Valentine’s Day, I am going to start a series of blog post on Marriage Tips.  Kyle and I have been married about 2 and a half years and I feel in my heart that we couldn’t be happier.  We have settled into our marriage and I thought I would share some things I think have really helped us get off to the right start.

To kick off the series I wanted to write about something I think is so important in our marriage.  We do everything with a team mentality.  We work together to accomplish our goals.  We help each other.  We are not afraid to roll up our sleeves to help the other person.

For example, we clean the house together.  We split up the things that need to be done and we do them separately to get the whole house done.  We do dishes together, laundry, we make dinner together, we shop together, and we work out together.  You probably realize that I am so lucky to have a husband who helps out around the house, and I realize this too.  I know how rare and special my husband is!!

Of course, there are times when we do things separately and just help the other person out if they are doing something else.  But that is kind of the point, we work together to get things done.  I feel like doing things this way relieves the other person of the entire burden and foster a healthy marriage where both people value the other ones time.

So marriage tip one is help each other out and be a team working together to accomplish your goals.  Helping each other out equals love, selflessly putting the other person ahead of you.

Show Love through your actions: Acts of Service

Through Sickness and Health

A True Love will be there for you in sickness and health.  We are in Texas for Thanksgiving and we got to spend time with Kyle's family.  His Grandmother is still in the hospital and his Grandfather is there by her side every day.  They have been married almost 68 years and he has been by her side ever since.

I am so grateful that Kyle has this example of love and loyalty because I think it has prepared him for our marriage.  I am so lucky to be a part of his family because there is so much love.  Everyone is so kind to one another and everyone is so easy going.  It truly has been a relaxing trip.

It feels really good to recharge my batteries after being so busy at work and just the day to day back in Atlanta.  Being here this week has reminded me what is most important in life... Family and Love.  The kind of love that will last through the decades.  That is what I hope to have.  I know we are on our way.

I think some of the secrets I have learned from being married and seeing healthy marriages are as follows:  Be kind to one another and never say anything you can't take back.  Do things that maybe you don't want to do sometimes because you know it will make the other person happy. Communicate constantly about your finances and make sure you are always on the same page about expenses and save for a rainy day.  Give generously to God and his Kingdom because it keeps you grounded in faith.   And, always keep God at the center of your marriage!!

Unanswered prayers

I was just praying about the things I thought I wanted in life and the things I love now that I have them.  When I was little I made a list: 1-20 about the characteristics I wanted in a husband.  (I wonder how many people have a list?!?)  Standards.  When it all comes down to it, I realize that there may be things that you think you want but some times you don't know what you need.  This is where God intervenes.  God knows not only what we really want but he gives us what we really need!!  He sees us through and lets us figure things out on our own but in the end we get what He knows will make us happy. 

Life is a quest on the pursuit of happiness, as I went into yesterday, it is a journey.  I am so grateful that I didn't have certain prayers answered because I wouldn't want my life to be any different.  My life is exactly how it should be.  I am so blessed that God has a perfect plan for me.  He has looked out for me throughout the years.  I went through some very difficult seasons but those experiences made me stronger and prepared for the things in my life now.  This song just about sums it up!!

"Unanswered Prayers"
     Garth Brooks

Just the other night a hometown football game
My wife and I ran into my old high school flame
And as I introduced them the past came back to me
And I couldn't help but think of the way things used to be

She was the one that I'd wanted for all times
And each night I'd spend prayin' that God would make her mine
And if he'd only grant me this wish I wished back then
I'd never ask for anything again

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he doesn't answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

She wasn't quite the angel that I remembered in my dreams
And I could tell that time had changed me
In her eyes too it seemed
We tried to talk about the old days
There wasn't much we could recall
I guess the Lord knows what he's doin' after all

And as she walked away and I looked at my wife
And then and there I thanked the good Lord
For the gifts in my life

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers

Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he may not answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered

Some of God's greatest gifts are all too often unanswered...
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers


 

Your Whole World

I love this idea.  I may be just one person to the world, but to one person I might be there whole world.  I live to do life with people, to have people in my life I can count on to be there for me when I need them.  I want to be that friend to someone as well.  I live to love and embrace the challenge to love those who are difficult to love.   The love of one person can change everything.  I know my husband's love has changed my world.  I can't imagine a world without love in it!  That is not a place I would want to be. 

God is love and if you feel that you are all alone, just remember God is love and to Him you are His whole world!!  He is desperate for you and to be there for you.  You have to accept Him into your heart, though.  He won't barge in unannounced.  He will wait for you.  He has to be personally invited into your life.  He doesn't just want to be there when you need something: money, good favor on a big project or event.  He wants to be included in everything.  He wants to be in constant conversation with you and included in the decision making process of your day to day life. 

This is mutual love: confiding in someone about your plans and doing life together.  God wants to do life with you.  He wants to be there for you in good times and bad.  I know one big thing that helps my relationship with my husband is we share our faith in God and he is always in the center of our relationship and he dictates our choices that we make together.  We honor each other to honor God as our marriage is our ministry.  When we are parents one day the best thing we can do is have a healthy marriage.  Every day we work towards loving each other more and continuing to build our life together!!