Tips for the "First" when you have a "Second"

 

Our boys

When you have a second child, life changes for everyone, especially for your first child. The whole family dynamic shifts dramatically, and sometimes it can be harder for a child to express how they feel about it. They have their own thoughts, but there may 3be uncertainty, even while you're still pregnant.

Once the baby is born, it's important not to make everything about the baby. Show the first child that they are still important and validate their feelings during the transition. They may subconsciously seek ways to gain more attention while it seems like everyone is focused on the baby.

My husband and I make a conscious effort to spend one-on-one time with our older son. I love having moments with him where it's just the two of us, and my husband also enjoys one-on-one time with him. We also plan activities for the three of us to enjoy together. Additionally, both my husband and I have taken separate trips with our son, just the two of us each time.

After 10 years between them, no one but the Lord knew this would ever happen. As you may know from my other blog posts, I had incredibly difficult postpartum issues after our first son was born. For about eight years, I truly believed we would not have any more children. However, at the beginning of 2023, the Lord changed my heart, and we decided to try for a second child.

We started trying, and I got pregnant. Heartbreakingly, I had a miscarriage and lost our angel baby at around six weeks. We all mourned the loss of our angel baby, whom we named Taylor. In Taylor’s honor, we planted an oak tree in our front yard.

After that, we got pregnant again with our now 9-month-old baby boy. There was a sweet happiness when he was born. One of the best parts has been watching our two sons interact. Our older son loves his baby brother—holding him, playing with him, reading to him, and showing him off. They already share a very special bond.

Our older son is now 11 and is a huge help with his little brother. Some mornings on the weekend, when the baby wakes up, our older son gets him, and they hang out together. It’s so nice for me and my husband to be able to sleep in on mornings like that! He has wanted a sibling for as long as he can remember, so he is incredibly grateful for his baby brother. I feel so blessed to be staying home with them and not "missing" any moments.

When they first met after the birth of our second boy, my heart almost exploded with joy. They are both fiercely loved. It is important to reassure the first child that your love for them remains just as strong. We are forever grateful for our two boys, and I look forward to loving them equally—though in different stages—for eternity.

The AMC Theaters vs. Regal Cinemas’ Baby Wars

As with our 10-year-old when he was little, we take our almost 8-month-old everywhere. This includes the movie theaters. Our little one is quite the moviegoer so far. He has seen “Dog Man,” “Wicked for Good” on Christmas Eve, “Moana,” and “Mufasa.” They were excellent movies!

Regal Cinemas on Towne Lake after "Dog Man"

 He rocked them all! He doesn't cry in movies, but he usually takes a little nap and may get a little fussy. The trick with a baby in the movie is to have: a comfy blanket, a pacifier, a non-noisy toy, and their food. If you want your kid to be good when you're out and about, you have to take them with you from a young age.

Regal Cinemas on Towne Lake at "Mufasa"

We have had 2 very different experiences when it comes to changing our baby’s diaper at the movie theater:

I am blessed with a very involved husband and father to our 2 boys. He also changes diapers when we are out and about. During “Wicked for Good” on Christmas Eve at the AMC Theater, he took our son out of the movie to change his dirty diaper. Unbeknownst to me or him, at the AMC Theater off Riverstone Pkwy in Canton, they do not have changing tables in their men’s or women’s bathrooms. This doesn't make sense to us.

"Wicked for Good" at AMC Theaters, Riverstone

How can a large establishment that hosts thousands of people a day not have changing tables in their bathrooms?

The only option to change him was on the movie theater hallway’s unused concession stand counter. Luckily, we have a changing pad we can put down to change our baby, but it is so disappointing that this AMC Theater does not provide bathrooms for babies wearing diapers.

"Moana 2" in 3D at Regal Cinemas on Towne Lake

On the other hand, when we saw “Dog Man” at the Regal Cinemas Movie Theater in Woodstock and had a much better experience. Not only did they have changing tables in both the men’s & women's restroom, they had the changing table disposable pads to put down! This is a great extra benefit that most places don't provide. It was a nice place to change our baby’s diaper with dignity…

 

Bathroom Changing table pads at Regal Cinemas on Towne Lake

We also like this Regal Cinemas movie theater because they have big reclining seats that are comfortable. They also have matinée prices that are almost half off!

Well done, Regal Cinemas!

 AMC Theaters, please make some changes.

Starbucks Location’s Discrimination Against New Mothers

It was December 23rd, 2024, a Monday. This happened at the Starbucks in Kennesaw, Georgia off Barrett Parkway.  440 Ernest W Barrett Pkwy NW, Kennesaw, GA 30144

I have a 6-month-old baby boy, named Jed Kody. He is so precious, and I love him dearly. I have been running errands since 11:00 a.m.  I drove all the way down to downtown Atlanta, for my first errand and took our new son with me.  I was making my way back up to Kennesaw to finish some other errands before heading home to Canton, GA. I wanted to stop for a late lunch- for me and my boy.

I like Starbucks' sandwiches and coffee so I stopped at the one right there on Barrett Pkwy. Traffic is, of course, insane with all the people still doing their holiday shopping right next to Town Center Mall. I enjoyed my yummy seasonal iced coffee and grilled cheese and was feeding our new son. He really wanted my grilled cheese and kept reaching for it!!

We were having a relaxing moment when I realized I needed to change his diaper before I left for home.  I was about to leave and asked to use the restroom because it has a code on it. There was a man in line in front of me and both single occupant bathrooms were in use. I waited as the man in front of me also waited.

Before I continued to wait in line for the bathroom, I went to ask the employees if they had a changing table in the bathroom. Two of the baristas said they, "didn't know.” I went back to wait for a bathroom and one of the bathrooms was opening. I asked the man in front of me if he could see if there was a changing table before I continued to wait. (They have gender neutral bathrooms.) He informed me there wasn't a changing table in the bathroom.

I went back up to a different barista and I asked her, "do you know there's no changing table in the bathroom?" She said, "Yes I do. [Starbucks] did a small renovation of the store and they removed the changing tables when they were doing the renovations. So, now there is no changing table in the bathrooms. They didn't ask us for our input." 

I walked away very upset and started wondering what I was going to do. No changing table in the bathrooms?! It’s 2 days before Christmas and traffic is everywhere. I just wanted to get home.

I had two options:

1. Change my baby in the cold, outside, out of the back of my SUV or

2. Change him right there on the table where I was sitting.

I am outraged that these were the only choices I had to change my new little son at Starbucks. I feel discriminated against as a new mother and against my son. I feel unwelcome at that Starbucks because it has bathrooms for everyone except new babies… on purpose.

 

Dear Starbucks’ Corporate Management,

Why did you make the corporate, deliberate, calculated decision to take changing tables out of the gender-neutral bathrooms? Was it because you didn't want your staff to have to clean extra things in the bathrooms? Was it because you didn't want possibly the smell of a diapers? Why would you remove the only bathroom for children of new mothers? Things are hard enough! I personally had a very hard time after both of my boys were born. This time included. Of course, the option of changing our son on the bathroom floor was out of the question!!

I'm very disappointed it was a deliberate decision to take out changing tables from the Kennesaw, GA bathrooms that had changing tables before "the small renovation."

I hope you consider putting the changing tables back into the gender-neutral bathrooms so parents can have a place to change their little children. I do enjoy your drinks and food, but hope you think about how your corporate decisions affect REAL families.

Sincerely,

Jen B

Why do we go to Church?

 

Easter Service, Woodstock City Church

Kyle and I ran into friends at Woodstock city church a couple Sundays ago and it piqued an interest to a topic I want to explore: Why do we go to church?

Spoiler: there is not a right or wrong answer!

I just want to think through it and share all the reasons I can think of to go to church:

to learn more about Jesus

to hear an inspiring message

Andy Stanley, North Point Community Church

to learn more about the Bible

to have a deeper understanding of the Bible

to get plugged into the church community

returning to faith

giving God a second chance

for Holidays

to be with family

to be with friends

because someone invited you

to meet other Christians

for support during a hard time

for a baptism

for a funeral

for hope

to learn about good morals

to find a Christian partner/spouse

new to faith

to hear Christian music

Woodstock City Church Band

(Catholic) for confession

for communion

because you feel guilty

to give your kids a good up bringing

so, your kids can experience any of the above, too

so, you go to Heaven

so, you don't go to Hell

I am sure there are many more reasons I haven't listed. You may not agree with some of these reasons or believe they are "right." But that is what is so great about church & ultimately following Jesus, there is not a right or wrong reason to go to church.

Of course, you don't have to go to church to have a relationship or salvation through Jesus! Believe Jesus is your Lord and Savior. Believe that he died for your sins, so you could have a relationship with God. Believe that He rose from the dead and ascended into Heaven, so that we may have eternal life! That is it. You can say that to God right now, and you are "IN!" "I believe Jesus is my Lord and savior."

Then, show good works and put your faith into ACTION!

Amen

Hebrews Il:1 "now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see."